Whenever i hear men or women, boys or girls saying things like;
"She must be a Muslim", "He must be an Anglican", "She must be a virgin", "He must not drink alcohol", "She must have this or he must possess that", conditional criteria that people make when it comes to selecting a life partner makes me wonder if such people know a thing about love or if it simply doesn't matter to them.
I am not trying to say that we humans don't have our individual tastes and all that, certainly not, for God Himself has already configured us to be attracted to certain unique qualities so as to strike a balance in creation as well as to fulfill His divine purpose.
However, many people do not understand their 'build' and go about making preposterous conditions that must be satisfied by the opposite sex before giving out their hearts to the successful candidate. Well, like the Italians would say; "they've not been hit by the thunderbolt".
What is this 'thunderbolt'? It's actually a trice when a guy sees a lady - and probably vice-versa - and he momentarily loses all reasoning ability with his heart skipping one or many beats, and the guy feels like he's travelling through space.
This feeling is completely different from infatuation. Some term it "love at first sight", your heart connects to another even when you're yet to know his/her name, not to mention her origin and character and the likes. In my humble opinion, i think this is how love is meant to be.
And that is what it is.
In true love, there's no reason. You simply can't tell or explain why you love him/her, for the feeling is coming from a place where you yourself have never been, and when you feel this way towards a person, you seldom notice any fault or mistake of theirs and even when you do, it's easy to forgive. Imagine a couple sharing that kind of love!
This can be likened to the kind of love that our Heavenly Father feels towards us. It doesn't make sense when one carnally tries to behold the idea that an all righteous, holy and just God can freely and lovingly provide air for an all dangerous, wicked and heartless murderer.
Worthy of note however, is the fact that this kind of love cannot be understood even by those wielding it, let alone by those surrounding them. Which is why it makes me sick to see a father or mother or uncle or aunt or brother or sister or just anybody trying to discredit another person's love! Especially when the reasons are based on racial, ethnic, traditional, religious, material or any other trivial differences aside spiritual reasons/revelations.
This is appalling and selfish.
I mention spiritual reasons here as an exemption because even as we may not like to acknowledge that fact, there are dark forces on earth, capable of misleading an individual to having such feelings which is unreal. Such a victim is in need of deliverance and if you happen to be sensitive enough to discern this evil, informing the victim may not be useful as your prayers for his/her ear might be temporarily 'blocked'. Hence the need for us as individuals to be prayerful enough to guard against such situations.
A piece of advice to those of us still writing lists and books of criteria to be met by your 'ideal' life partner, just imagine this scenario;
Imagine a decent black guy who doesn't drink that much, maybe a habitual two bottles of beer every weekend, having a long list to be satisfied by his ideal bride. He patiently searches for say three years to find this perfect girl and eventually discovers a lady who passes all of his requirements in distinction and having on the top of her own list, "He mustn't drink at all" or somewhere in the middle, "He must be fair"...
Don't be selfish writing any list, God knows you best and he wants the best for you too. Put your trust in Him, be prayerful and love freely. All your 'requirements' for a happy home will definitely be met.
God Bless Nigeria.
